Higher ground may be allocated by annual ballot
A model climate-mobility treaty would give the citizens of a sinking state a fixed number of permanent places each year in a larger neighbour, drawn at random. Everything else about a family's future would be scheduled around the draw.
Under a bilateral arrangement now being sketched by officials in two states, citizens of a low-lying country would receive a defined annual quota of permanent residence places in a larger neighbouring one. The quota would not be an emergency measure and would not be triggered by any particular flood. It would simply arrive every year, like a fiscal deadline, and would be allocated by lottery.
The design is deliberately undramatic. A quota ends the argument about numbers. A ballot ends the argument about who deserves a place, which officials on both sides describe as the argument that would otherwise never finish. What remains is a date, a registration window, and a randomiser that neither government would be permitted to look inside.
Within a household the effect would be structural rather than emotional. A family would register together, because the model would treat a household as a single entry, and would then spend the year maintaining two plans: one in which the roof is repaired, and one in which repairing it is not worth the money. Both plans would be reasonable. Only one could be acted on, and nobody would know which until the draw.
“This is not an evacuation,” a spokesperson for the drafting ministry would say. “An evacuation is what you organise when there is no time. This is what you organise when there is time, and it is much harder to explain, because it looks exactly like ordinary migration paperwork and it is not ordinary migration paperwork.”
Oversubscription would be the whole story. If registrations exceeded places by an order of magnitude, as officials on both sides would expect, then in any given year the great majority of a nation would receive a courteous letter confirming that nothing has changed. Ministries would spend more time drafting that letter than drafting the visa.
The second-order effects are the ones nobody budgets for. A teacher, a nurse and an electrician would be drawn with exactly the same probability as anyone else, so the sending state would lose capacity at random rather than at need, and would lose it every single year on schedule. A ballot is fair in precisely the sense that a tossed coin is fair: it is indifferent to what the country still requires in order to function.
Nothing here is a deportation and nothing here is forced, which is what makes the model attractive to both governments and unsettling to everyone inside it. A family would never be told to leave. A family would be told, once a year, that it may — and would then have a few weeks to decide whether it wants the future it has spent twelve months rehearsing.
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Still laughing
We made it up. Then reality caught up.
What we wrote
We wrote it in 2021
One day the junior developer's main skill could be describing the problem clearly enough for the machine to solve it.
What actually happened
Reality caught up in 2025
AI coding assistants are built into mainstream development tools, and producing code from a plain-language description is now a routine part of professional software work.
Vendor product documentation and developer surveys on assistant adoption.
The joke was the job description. The job description was updated.
MISTAKE
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